It's 2009. Undoubtedly you are aware of this, but it's finally sinking in on my end. I feel that the past year was spent doing a whole lot of nothing: saving money only to spend it on nothing, stuck in a dysfunctional relationship and living a dysfunctional and unhappy life, working and working and working at a job that became more and more painful as the time went on, living under a roof where I felt useless and alone, and clutching at straws to improve my situation. How that manifested was more dysfunction with the person I loved the most, chronic bouts of extreme guilt and internalization, and a series of unfortunate and embarrassing transgressions. I felt perverted, impotent, and ashamed. Eventually the situation straightened out and I my atrophied sense of self-worth became to ameliorate and some real growth took place. My partner and I decided to not date any longer, and for the better. A strange parallel to how I felt during the past year was the itinerary of fun and rewarding events: The formation of a new band, many shows, recording, meeting people and continuously seeing old and new friends, travels here and there, slumber parties, movie nights, sweating and dancing and loving.
I just returned from a silly trip to southern Florida with my friend Jen. I'll have pictures soon, but at any rate, it's time for renewal on a massive scale. 2009 will find the author in a good place.
SOUTH FLORIDA 1/4-11, 2009
Some background, first. The Worcester Regional Airport is something of a joke to most people, it is used for civil aviation missions, private flights and the like. Every few years a two-bit airline will move in and try to fill the obvious hole in the market. Perennial epic fail. Jen and I decided to take advantage of the almost affordable rate and fly to Florida, for no solid reason. Here is what happened:
We departed on sunday afternoon. The airplane was small and the fanciest either of us has ever experienced. We're talking a full-on multimedia system for every seat. We watched our craft's location live on googlemaps and played cheesy games. It was almost cool. We landed at an airport rather similar to ours at home, in Punta Gorda, FL. Oddly enough my rich aunt & uncle were on board the same flight. We were greeted by 70+ degree weather and flat terrain that always strikes my New England mind as alien and slightly unbalancing. We were staying with strangers, folks we met on couchsurfing. They were an older couple who lived in a gated elderly community. That description makes our hosts sound far less cool than they actually are; the wife was a former hang-gliding instructor and the husband is a part-time teacher of engineering and a veteran hitchhiker of several decades who gave us tips. He suggested that I shaved. We departed the next morning and walked to the highway on ramp in nowhere Port Charlotte. We were in good spirits as we watched fancy car after fancy car of frumpy-looking old folks pass us by and gawk at our cardboard sign and general scruffiness; we were in retirement country. Eventually a low-level KFC executive picked us up and brought us a little ways, perhaps to Fort Myers. Another man, a furniture installer from New Jersey brought us to Naples. We found ourselves stuck in this nowhere place, with night approaching and no rides. A member of Collier County's finest, an overweight and bald dude with a bad attitude, stopped his cruiser and informed us of the illegality of our travels(which in reality is false). He told us our behavior is not tolerated in his county, and that we could walk to the bus station and get out. We blindly walked for a couple hours past endless gated compounds and country clubs to the bus station and took a bus through the Everglades to Miami.
We walked around Miami all day after semi-sleeping in the bus and bus station. The sterile affluence of the coastline was downright disconcerting. We tried to get rides south. Fail fail fail. We took a nap in a park, got in good spirits again, and took a bus to Key Largo, where we had the opportunity to stay with our friend's dad.
- More, soon. Maybe -
xo
DS
Monday, January 12, 2009
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